Back on Tumblr
Lolz so it’s the night before the ACT so obviously I’m gonna spend it listening to Taylor Swift and actually relaxing. I remembered I had made a Tumblr so maybe I’ll be one of THOSE people and blog. Woo blogging. I’m a hormonal teenage girl so OBVIOUSLY I will be blogging about my feelings. Sometimes it’s good to just let all dese feels out.
Where to start, that is the question. Ok so I legit cried tonight. Out of happiness. I tend to do this a lot, which if you know me in person is kind of hard to picture. ANYWAY I was looking through my box of stuff tonight and found a flash drive which surprised me because I don’t remember owning a flash drive. So I plugged it in and found a bunch of photos in folders but there was a folder called “save”. I opened it and that’s when I started tearing. It was a bunch of screenshots from texts HE sent me in the summer of 2011. It’s so weird to think we had such strong feelings for each other back then too. Now that we’re actually together, it’s kind of incredible to look at them. There’s stuff about us questioning what’ll happen between us in the future. Well, 15-year-old Hira, you turned out to be his. I guess when I fell in love the first time, I just never fell out of it. When he started dating the other girl, I hated myself for so long and distanced myself quite a bit from everyone. I came home, slept, ate, did homework, and slept again. It was legitimately the worst period of my life and I’m glad it’s in the past now. But when we reconnected this summer, all those old feelings almost IMMEDIATELY came back. I’m so thankful for my friends who peer pressured me into confessing to him how I felt. Because TBH he’s a pussy and wouldn’t have done it himself, even though he claims he would’ve done it eventually since he felt the same way. BUT ANYWAY, I feel so blessed and lucky to have him in my life. I know it’s a stupid teenage girlish thing to give a boy control of your emotions, but I’m okay with doing that. He deserves it. He has made me SO FUCKING HAPPY in the time we’ve had together. I don’t even know how long that is…we started talking June 2011 so like 17 months?? That’s an incredibly long time to be in love with someone this day in age. I’m glad I screenshotted those things he said because looking at how I felt then and how I feel now, I realize I still love him so much. I’m glad he’ll never read this because I specifically told him NOT to tell me he loves me unless he without a doubt means it but I’m saying it now because I truly do love that kid. Like with all my heart. I don’t know what I would do without him. One of the screenshots I found was him saying “I want you to know even if I don’t say this enough, I do love you” and that’s when I started crying. HOW DID I GET SO LUCKY. And also in that folder on the flash drive was a photo of him from the field trip where I first saw him. In that green shirt. Looking so freaking cute. I took a really cute photo of him because our teacher asked the girls to take photos of the guys posing like the Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders and I had had my eye on the kid in the green shirt the whole field trip so he was the first one I took a photo of. They say only the people who have experienced love at first sight believe in it and I agree whole-heartedly. It’s so weird to explain it to someone who hasn’t felt that rush of OMGILOVEYOUANDIJUSTSAWYOU. It was like magic, as cheesy as that sounds. One thing I learned from the movie Aquamarine- that’s why humans go after love so much, it’s the closest thing we have to magic. It feels unreal when we kiss and I’m glad I get to do it so often. Gah I only WISH everyone else could experience the happiness I feel all the time now. That’s what he’s given to me. Happiness and magic. That’s WAY more than I could ever ask for. He is the one for me, no doubt. I love him.
10-26-2012
She claims to have given birth to me.
I don’t think I’ve ever felt such strong hate towards anyone before. She’s the most hypocritical human you will ever meet. My mother is rude, inconsiderate, and selfish. Nothing big really happened to prompt this its just a bunch of bottled up emotions that I have been having to deal with a lot lately. Idk what’s gotten into her but she just thinks she has the right to act like she is better than everyone else when she doesn’t do anything herself anyway. Fuck you, honestly. You put me through hell all the fucking time and I don’t want to deal with it any longer. I know for a fact you are not my mother nor will you ever be. You don’t have the capability of being nice and I don’t appreciate it. I don’t need you and you are an around the clock bitch. You yell at me all day and then dad gets home and you put on the fakest fucking look like you’ve done nothing wrong. Newsflash if you don’t know how to treat your kids properly, you’ve failed at the one job that God gave you. You are a mean, inconsiderate, evil jerk whose only purpose in life is to ruin mine. I hope I don’t have to see you again once I’m in college. Until then I have to put up with your ugly personality. If only I had the strength to keep my father on my side
I don’t even know how to blog. WTF IS DIS SHIT. Anyway there’s supposed to be a meteor shower with shooting stars tonight COOLIO but I have to poop right now. Tumblr is geh. I have nothing to look forward to in life. I have like no romantical feelings for anyone right now which is SUPER WEIRD. Haven’t had any since last summah how awks.
Anonymous asked1.Do you want a boyfriend or girlfriend? Boyfriend. I’m hetero.
- 2.When did your last hug take place? Today I hugged my little sister.
- 3.Are you a jealous person? I don’t think so. I am as carefree as they come I think.
- 4.Are you tired right now? Ehh not really.
- 5.Do you chew on your straws? Ew no I don’t haha
- 6.Have you ever been called a tease? Nope!
- 7.Have you ever been awake for 48 hours straight? LOL no, I am the biggest sleep fanatic.
- 8.Do you cry easily? Hmm well I cried at this super emotional scene in Harry Potter 5 today so yes!
- 9.What should you be doing right now? Sleeping or reading Brave New World
- 10.Are you a heavy sleeper? I don’t know…I really like sleep and my absolute BIGGEST pet peeve is people waking me up when I’m asleep.
- 11.Do you think you can last in a relationship for 6 months? Lol I don’t know about this one either…it has never happened before. I would hope it happens one day but I get annoyed with people if I spend too much time with them :/
- 12.Are you mad at someone right now? Nah
- 13.Do you believe in love? What the hell kind of a question is that?? Yes I believe in love.
- 14.What makes you laugh no matter what? THE OFFICE. If anyone brings up Dwight Schrute especially, I will marry them.
- 15.Who was the last person you talked to? My friend Brandon on text and Skype call with my friends Natalie, Libby, and Paulina.
- 16.Do you get butterflies around the person you like? I don’t like no one right now. Nor have I in like a long time.
- 17.Will you get married? YES.
- 18.When was the last time you smiled? When Paulina read out the message someone sent her on Twitter.
- 19.Does anyone like you? HOW WOULD I KNOW
- 20.Do you secretly like someone? Nope.
- 21.Who was the first person you talked to today? Like when I woke up?…probably my mother.
- 22.Who do you feel most comfortable talking to about anything? my friends that I Skyped with just now.
- 23.What are you NOT looking forward to? Everyone parting ways in less than a year when we graduate :( I want to get out of this town but I don’t wanna separate from my friends and some lovely people.
- 24.What ARE you looking forward to? Getting the hell out of this boring suburbic town.
- 25.Has someone of the opposite sex ever told you they loved you, and meant it? Yep. HOLLA if you’re looking for a good story.
- 26.Suppose you see your ex kissing another person what would you do? Nothing.
- 27.Do you plan on moving out within the next year? A little over a year.
- 28.Are you a forgiving person? Yep. I’m like Jesus.
- 29.How many TRUE friends do you have? 5ish.
- 30.Do you fall for people easily? I don’t understand this question…
- 31.Have you ever fallen for your ex’s best friend? Nope.
- 32.What’s the last thing you put in your mouth? Water.
- 33.Who was the last person you drove with? My mother.
- 34.How late did you stay up last night and why? Probably till like 2 AM and because IT IS SUMMER #YOLO
- 35.If you could move somewhere else, would you? Yes, in a heartbeat. I wannaa see the city and I do NOT mean Dallas when I say city. That place is crap.
- 36.Who was the last person you took a picture of? My little sister. She looked cute. That’s why.
- 37.Can you live a day without TV? Did it all of junior year basically.
- 38.When was the last time you were extremely disappointed? Umm EXTREMELY would be when last summer ended. HOLLA if you’re looking for a story.
- 39.Three names you go by.. Hira, Hurra, and Hotstuff…the last one I call myself.
- 40.Are you currently in a relationship? No.
- 41.What is your all-time favorite romance movie? TITANIC <3
- 42.Do you believe that everyone has a soul-mate? No. Not everyone.
- 43.What’s your current problem? College apps.
- 44.Have you ever had your heart broken? Yes I have. Most tragic thing ever for a girl, I swear.
- 45.Your thoughts of long distance relationships? Won’t work for me.
- 46.How many kids do you want to have? At least two.
- 47.Have you ever found it hard to tell someone you like them? No.
Been in this position a lot in my life, mostly with all the things that happened end of summer/beginning of school year. Very glad that it’s over but also glad the tough times happened, I’m much stronger and thankful now
Hope~
Anonymous askedHahaha you know wut it is brah ;) haha jk I had cereal just now
Please?
- 1.Do you want a boyfriend or girlfriend?
- 2.When did your last hug take place?
- 3.Are you a jealous person?
- 4.Are you tired right now?
- 5.Do you chew on your straws?
- 6.Have you ever been called a tease?
- 7.Have you ever been awake for 48 hours straight?
- 8.Do you cry easily?
- 9.What should you be doing right now?
- 10.Are you a heavy sleeper?
- 11.Do you think you can last in a relationship for 6 months?
- 12.Are you mad at someone right now?
- 13.Do you believe in love?
- 14.What makes you laugh no matter what?
- 15.Who was the last person you talked to?
- 16.Do you get butterflies around the person you like?
- 17.Will you get married?
- 18.When was the last time you smiled?
- 19.Does anyone like you?
- 20.Do you secretly like someone?
- 21.Who was the first person you talked to today?
- 22.Who do you feel most comfortable talking to about anything?
- 23.What are you NOT looking forward to?
- 24.What ARE you looking forward to?
- 25.Has someone of the opposite sex ever told you they loved you, and meant it?
- 26.Suppose you see your ex kissing another person what would you do?
- 27.Do you plan on moving out within the next year?
- 28.Are you a forgiving person?
- 29.How many TRUE friends do you have?
- 30.Do you fall for people easily?
- 31.Have you ever fallen for your ex’s best friend?
- 32.What’s the last thing you put in your mouth?
- 33.Who was the last person you drove with?
- 34.How late did you stay up last night and why?
- 35.If you could move somewhere else, would you?
- 36.Who was the last person you took a picture of?
- 37.Can you live a day without TV?
- 38.When was the last time you were extremely disappointed?
- 39.Three names you go by..
- 40.Are you currently in a relationship?
- 41.What is your all-time favorite romance movie?
- 42.Do you believe that everyone has a soul-mate?
- 43.What’s your current problem?
- 44.Have you ever had your heart broken?
- 45.Your thoughts of long distance relationships?
- 46.How many kids do you want to have?
- 47.Have you ever found it hard to tell someone you like them?
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